maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
