Will you blow on my dice?
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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