Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Randomize