so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
