There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
