would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
You have to summon your inner elephant
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
