I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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