1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
