Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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