Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
The Olympian is in my bed
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
