I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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