he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
