I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Randomize