what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
