This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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