her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
