everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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