Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
