Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
