I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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