The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
