Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
