We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize