Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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