It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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