I'm lost and stupid without you.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
That was an excessively violent trivia night
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize
