is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Randomize
