now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
