hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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