i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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