I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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