I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
