2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
