Whatcha textin bout Willis?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
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