these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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