There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
