You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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