do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize