Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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