Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
