About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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