I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Girls should come with a carfax report
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
