My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
