$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
