Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Randomize
