their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize