i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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