i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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