ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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