the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
