Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
